Chronicle Summer 2002: week 1
by Dunya Dianne McPherson

Wednesday, June 26, 2002 Chebeague Island

THE PRACTICE:
Traveling Right Arm, Left Arm
Good for walking outdoors. Wear a Walkman, Discman or Ipod or something to provide music for you. Wear shoes without too much tread but sufficient rubber to cushion your foot bones. Loose clothes.

Walk at a brisk pace. (Let the music determine that.) As you walk, move only the right arm for a while. Let it really develop. I would suggest 5-10 minuets. Then let it rest while you let the left arm move. (If you do this exercise frequently, initiate with the left first for a change.) Let the left arm rest. Then work with them both together - parallel movement or independent movement. Let this develop. 10 minutes. (You'll see that we have been walking a half hour now.)

Next add body motion or minor foot patterns but try not to lose the pace. By this time I usually am in a different state of mind and so either want to let the arms rest or know what else they want to do.

Some suggestions for foci:
Patterned progressions
Lyric motion
Large range of motion, or conversely, limited range
Detailed hands movements
Isometric work, one arm resisting against the other
Contrasting density of movement
Awareness of breath
These lend themselves to the trance-like nature of the activity of walking and covering terrain. Since you are keeping your eyes open, slow arm movement or deeply proprioceptive activity is less likely to work. You must stay awake to traffic, other walkers or rough ground underfoot.

Journal
A hazy day. Cool by the shore and warm when walking speedily on the inner roads. Very fragrant.

I wasn't sure of my environment. I was looking out for cars and to see where the houses were. Children were playing cards at one house. There was a lot of distance between houses and mostly woods. If a car did occasionally pass they waved - seemed sympathetic, amused or nonchalant. I was moving my arms. Making patterns or discovering patterns. Pattern happened on it’s own. I added body movement when it came up, usually when I was out of view, returning to a straight torso when visible to others.

When I get back to the House I stretch briefly on the lawn and move on to the Perpetual Motion Exercise. The lawn is somewhat unwieldy for footwork. If I don't worry about feet too much it is an excellent outdoor practice. I notice the neighbor on the adjacent porch for a while but don't feel too conspicuous about this activity.

I then danced freely to the Pandit Swapan Chaudhuri, Indian tabla master. I locked in. The magic of dance seeping into and out of me. The excitement of rhythms emerging and forming themselves in me. I feel much happier in my body, at home.

Friday, June 28, 2002
Chebeague Island, ME

THE PRACTICE:
Fluid Yoga with space limitations.
If your mat is between two beds you'll have no side-to-side room. Use the beds to push isometrically with legs when not able to do a full roll. Also find more middle range motions that go halfway to the side. Everything else fits within the column of the mat spatially and therefor is as usual.

Journal
Today there were miniscule places between ribs, in hip sockets and down my spine requesting patient time and attention. They felt hot and cranky. All loaded with frustration, like an over-tired child. I think I have not been listening to/and caring for my body much these past few days.

Clarifications:
The stretch threshold has two parts. The subjective or proprioceptive aspect is constant. The objective aspect - range of motion - changes. This is to say, stretching always feels exactly the same but some days I am more limber and others, stiffer. This is an important distinction for me as I tend to get self-critical about sensation. It’s the " I feel stiff therefor I am stiff" syndrome when in reality I could be as extended as usual but not feeling as open.

The objective assessment of limberness is a tricky business. It is useful if the tendency is to get lazy and do less and less. Not so good if getting into flaying oneself.

The sensation of openness is its own feeling. How to produce it? That is the question.

I find that I am fighting against myself a lot these days. I struggle. My inner script is one of dissatisfaction with self that I then inflict on my body. Breathing inside the length of the stretch is crucial to suspending self-judgement. I went into Twisted Pigeon and instead of holding the pose and waiting, I pushed down gently on the top hand on my inhale and released the pressure of the push slightly on the exhale. This continuous activity transmuted the asana into a movement process. As a movement it triggered spinal release and fully engaged my attention. I was able to relax.

THE PRACTICE:
Perpetual Motion Dance in Limited Space

Journal
Second practice session
Short. Nab a few moments in the tiny vestibule to Yellow House. My father drifts to sleep on the sofa in the adjoining room as he listens to the radio - Schumann's "Quintet in E Flat for Piano and Strings". I'm in a small, square space. My eyes graze over old, pitted plaster walls. On one side narrow stairs twist up, dynamic vertical and horizontal lines shooting from a whitewashed crosshatch of supports and banisters. Like looking up at a bell tower. My feet adjust carefully to the smooth wide but irregular floorboards. I trot over the threshold and back in rhythms doing circular movements atop metronomic footing. Through the open door Casco Bay reclines in ambivalent light - to the east the horizon is dense blue-gray cloud cover, while the westerly view splits to hazy but brilliant shafts of light, like God piercing a veil.

I have no stamina. Become easily tired. But keep to the end of the music by letting go of intense efforts. Just taking in this strange but beautiful spatial container.

Monday, July 1, 2002
Chebeague Island, ME

PRACTICE:
Fluid Yoga.
Internal Body Scan.
Lay on your back Scan your body with an inner eye. Then watch whatever area is shadowy or demanding. Keep your attention there as the story unfolds. Do not interfere with your body's world, just observe.

Journal
Early morning. I am stiff after a very long sleep. The day is foggy, cool; cannot see to Deer Point and barely to Little Chebeague across the bar. The Studio floor sends a chill up my bare feet. I work on my mat to insulate me. I stretch even though I know my body will feel tight. The after effect is worth it. I open and release.

At the end I go into a long internal scan, watching my hip sockets dream. The line of motion they are generating is so far from their actual placement that initially I find it alarming. I remind myself to let them dream. To express to me where they are at.

The right hip is airy and jangly. Almost comical. It detaches itself and totters the femur in space like a baton. The bone image fades off as a swirling cloud mushrooms out and around the left side of my body. It has a pastel tone to it though color does not predominate

The right hip, by contrast, cleaves to the center line of my body. It gathers a dark curl of debris, like the dark eel grass down on the shore. This spills over to the left side of my pelvis. It continues to wash to the left until it collects along the outside edge of my left hip and thigh. I watched as the density and color of the image gradually fade.

Everything moving leftward. It never comes back to center. I need more of this. I have been unable to connect to my torso. It has felt blocked and dense. This morning is the first time I have had the patience to stay with it since the beginning of my journey.

Internal scan is the most rigorous aspect of my practice. To keep my mind focused on the mix of sensation and imagery fomenting within and not do anything about it is challenging, sometimes impossible. My three escape valves: wandering away in my mind; becoming impatient and trying to change it; trying to correct. I am working with these three avoidance tendencies.

©2002 by Dunya Dianne McPherson